Solitude or Loneliness, Who Cares Which?

It's Poetry Friday and hosted by someone I like to think of as a friend that I have never met but feel like I know - Linda Baie at Teacherdance.  If you don't know Linda yet, go there to meet her and make a new friend!  Oh, and find more poetry linkups there, too.
Additionally, on Wednesday the new Poetry Jam prompt was issued... "Write about loneliness or solitude."  I have written a poem to address the issue.

Solitude or Loneliness, Who Cares Which?

I’m all alone at home again
I’m writing, and I’ve
tried
to ignore the constant scuffling
of two dogs by my
side,
and then there is the white cat
being obviously
denied
access to his sleeping place
and where he likes to
hide.
Oh, I talk to them - they listen with
their heads cocked to one
side.
So if I say I’m lonesome
I'd have have to say I’ve
lied.
My days are not my own,
I could use some
solitude.
Can't say that I don't like my pets;
I'd never be that
rude,
But when I try to gather thoughts
they carelessly
intrude,
And all my writings and my dreams
seem to be pet
imbued.
Solitude or loneliness -
oh, does it matter
which?
I think that either one might
surely cure me of this
twitch.
But then of course I’d lack excuse
for a poetic
glitch.

©Donna JT Smith, 2015

J is for Jacob & Rachel

The day of J-ay.
And this first poem was a first poem, scheduled and ready to post.  Then I came back to it today (which is yesterday officially for you) to check and see what I had put together.  I wasn't satisfied with it.  So I started messing with it.  I was just going to add to it, but then before I knew it:
Cut.  Revise.  Cut.  Paste in a different spot.  Cut.  Add. Edit-Undo, Edit-Undo.  Rewrite.  Add.  Think. Think.  Admonition to self - "Stop thinking and just see, feel and write".  Cut a bit, move a bit.  Done.  Whoops!  One more word change.

So the first poem just under the picture is old, below ~~~~~~ is new and revised.

"Jacob & Rachel"

1.
The lobsterman's job

To pass on to kin:

The traps are hauled up

And then tossed back in.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2.
With barnacled hands
Sand dollar skin
 Periwinkle eyes
And rocky hard chin
He’s  a part of the land
A part of the sea
 A heart for the deep and
For his family.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3.
Barnacled hands,
Sand dollar skin,
 Periwinkle eyes,
Rocky ledge chin;
 Part of the land,
Portion of sea;
 Heart for the deep
And for family.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And now that I see both together, the second one is nothing at all like the original.  That's good.  Do you agree?  Or do you prefer the first?
"But I see three poems here," I hear you saying.  Okay, just came back to this, this morning, and did some cutting and resulted in #3.  That's my pick.  What a transition!  I think I'm finally happy with it.  Less is more here.  J is also for Just Do It.
I like revising.  Do you?  Have you ever started with a poem or piece and messed with it so much that it ended up totally different?

Educational Jargon:

Jumbo: A lobster that weighs over 2-1/2 pounds.

Unwritten Thoughts

Sometimes when you are reading other people's material, and you make a connection . . .

like, "yeah, that's totally happened to me",

or  "hey, I'm with you on that one, dude". . .

but you never wrote it down . . .

Unwritten thoughts

Spilled and are lost

All for the want of my pen

Gone to the wind

Float to the sky

Never my musing again

Someday they will

Drift back to earth

Finding some other like soul

With pen in hand

They’ll scribe those thoughts

Claiming a notion they stole


Check out more poetry topics for Friday on Poetry Friday hosted by Julie at The Drift Record