Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Quiet

My only thought this morning was of winter quiet, though yesterday's winter weather was anything but quiet. It icy-rained alllllll day. Here's hoping that in the light of day, ice hasn't encapsulated the car that wouldn't fit in the garage. That aside, I love the quiet snow gives the world. You could almost picture snow being warm to wrap up in... but it gets pretty hard to think of it that way the more you know snow...
So here's a short poem for today. I have lots to do and little time to write.
Look at the date! Do you see how close we are to Christmas? Well, I am not ready for it.

cold
quiet snow 
lending
night shroud
quietly
elegantly
mending
the loud

Okay, this was supposed to be a short poem, and it ended up being one.  However, I wrote in Pages, then copied and pasted it here. I wasn't happy with it.  So it got longer.  Then I edited and revised in this space.  I cut most of it.  This wasn't even in the original originally.  It was a last minute addition and the only part I kept.  I just say that because I find it strange how poems happen sometimes.  And because I'm proud of myself.  Not for the poem itself, but for the fact that I am getting better at just cutting through garbage.  Just because I wrote it, doesn't mean I have to own it.  That is a hard concept sometimes - a "Yes, but I had more stuff - how can you tell me it isn't worth the cyberspace it was printed on?" mentality that I love challenging.  I love winning that debate with myself!



29 comments:

  1. I enjoyed reading about your writing process, Donna. I like that you are learning to cut through garbage and change your original poem to something different. I would much rather read one like yours today than one that goes on and on and on and the writer has cut absolutely nothing!! Nice view of 'quiet.' Liked 'elegantly mending the loud.'

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I, personally, liked that line. It began as "ending" instead of "mending"...when my brain saw or heard "mending" I knew that was what it was supposed to be.

      Delete
  2. A thought process instigated by the will of wanting to be perfect. You've got it Donna!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, that has kind of been a lifelong problem, too!

      Delete
  3. "mending the loud" that's owerful

    have a nice Wednesday

    much love...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Gillena! Wednesday is looking better than yesterday, so far anyway! Terrible weather here.

      Delete
  4. Simple words that say everything.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I enjoyed reading how you wrote your poem as much as the poem itself. My own poetry got a little slimmer to recently. "I love winning that debate with myself!" - This made me smile. These are indeed great victories.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, those are oddly satisfying victories! I find that the more I write, the more I am fascinated by the brain's processing.

      Delete
  6. Congratulations on self-editing. It is interesting how poems just happen sometimes. Snow is a quiet thing but with its cold and solid bulk is such a powerful thing. Keep warm.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Editing can be a painful process, but so cleansing when you can just let go of the excess....now if I could just do that more in my house as I learn to in my writing!

      Delete
  7. Love small poems that say so much and it was illuminating how you arrived at the end result, well done.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes it is much more of a process than others, isn't it?

      Delete
  8. i like the line "mending the loud"
    i was just commenting at Nick's that i love the hush that comes
    with falling snow...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There is such a quiet when the snow blankets everything. I love the muffled sounds.

      Delete
  9. Donna,

    The necessary words, say it all. Winter quietness is wonderful, especially in the snowy setting.. A fine description.

    Eileen

    ReplyDelete
  10. Beautiful poem! I love short and sweet poems. :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Simple and evocative. I loved it.

    Here is a little trivia for you, for those times when you, like me, find that you need to cut words:

    Mark Twain: "If you find an adjective, kill it."

    ReplyDelete
  12. A delicate and emotive piece. Very pretty. Sometimes, less is more, as they say. (By the way loved: not "worth the cyberspace it was printed on" - LOL, so drolly put.)

    ReplyDelete
  13. "night shroud"… that is wonderful. Nice ending as well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Margaret. Our snow is spotty now after some rains...but I'm sure it will be back to cover us again.

      Delete
  14. Very short and sweet and to the point. I see micro-poetry becoming more of a fad nowadays. This one was able to portray the concept that you described in your description of the day. I think it is important for micro-poetry to do exactly that: describe a single idea wholly. Good work :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks. Sometimes I'm pretty wordy... and sometimes not. And I guess that may be taken both ways.

      Delete
  15. Donna I liked your thought process behind the poem, and yes we all read best of best. Great words that express a lot :)

    ReplyDelete

Drop some breadcrumbs! Let me know you were here!